Tuesday, January 3, 2017
HANGOVER? COULD WE STILL BE "SOCIAL DRINKERS"?
For more than 20 years, I was a highly functioning alcoholic. A serious alcoholic, but highly functioning.
Even though I helped other people get sober and, traveled the world as an international speaker, was on national radio and TV and was writing books... there is no doubt that I was an alcoholic.
If you find yourself one day a week one day a month one day every six months waking up with a hangover we have to tell the truth...A hangover is the result of consuming more alcohol than your body can possibly handle. Alcohol is a poison. In small amounts it's not detrimental, but we're talking like one drink per day...for women. For men? No more than two drinks per day.
And even though those are guidelines, there are some women and men that if they have one or two drinks they wake up the next day feeling fatigued. Not themselves.
Others like myself, when I was at the height of my drinking, I could drink easily a bottle to two bottles of wine a night, wake up in the morning shake it off, or so I thought I was, and work really hard for 10 or 12 hours every day.
But I was fooling myself. I was in complete denial. I was justifying and rationalizing my addiction. Do you do the same thing?
For me, being a very successful businessman, meant drinking with business associates. It meant going out to bars to seal deals. It meant going to parties after I just got off stage to fit in with everyone else.
About 33% of Americans struggle with alcohol. Many struggle in silence. They become isolated drinkers. Others struggle in public. They are involved in society, looking for any opportunity as an excuse to drink with others.
Some of you who read this post will be pissed off. Why is David Essel writing about alcoholism, and saying that I might be an alcoholic just because I had a hangover on New Year's Day?
Very few people who have hangovers only have them once a year. So we get really good with denial. Really good with justifying the amount we drink and what we drink.
I have helped thousands of men and women get sober, some who were bartenders or waiters and waitresses...and they went back to work in the environment where alcohol flows freely every day.
The number one step that we have to take is to get out of denial. And that's a big damn step to take. No one wants to be without alcohol, if you use it as a social lubricant, as a way to relax, as a way to go to sleep, as a way to deal with boredom, or anger, or insecurity.
I used to use alcohol for every reason imaginable to man. Every statement in the above paragraph, was open territory for me to have that first glass of wine. As the years moved on I loved to drink in solitude. After my very last counseling and coaching session at 8 PM, I would walk in the door and immediately open that first bottle of wine. I deserved it. I work hard. I make a lot of money, I should be able to do whatever the hell I want.
Great attitude right? Total denial.
Let me repeat this because for many of us it sucks to hear it, even though it's true. Whenever we wake up feeling tired, or with a hangover after night of drinking, we are no longer a social drinker. We are either in the stages of dependency or alcoholism.
Whether you are dependent upon alcohol or a full blown alcoholic, which has nothing to do with how much money you make, how many kids you have, how long you been married, or what your astrological sign is... If you need alcohol to relax or to deal with emotions in life you are an alcoholic.
The great news? If people like myself can recover and be totally recovered from alcohol you can as well.
I don't believe in the statement that once you're in alcoholic you're an alcoholic for life. What a bunch of crap. Oh my god there's so many statements from the 40s 50s and 60s that people still spout over and over and over again that have no validity. If you want to fully recover from alcohol you can. You're not an alcoholic for life. Drop that crap right outside your door and kick it to the curb.
On the other hand, if you're tired of being tired, or tired of getting into arguments with your partner, or tired of having to have a drink before you go to the party or out to dinner. Or if you're tired in general, and you don't make it to the gym, maybe you've gained weight, maybe you're impatient, contact me.
I don't judge anyone. My work in this world is to help people to reach their highest potential in life. For me and millions of other people like me, musicians, rock stars, actresses, actors, sports stars, and every day people sobriety is not only possible it's freaking amazing!
There is no better time than right now to get sober. Make 2017 the Year of Sobriety. Your attitude will improve. Your health will improve. Believe it or not your sleep will improve. Your relationships will improve. Your confidence will improve. Your self-esteem will improve. You will begin to become the very best version of yourself that you ever imagined possible.
I know it because I'm living proof myself as well as with 1000 other people that I've helped get sober. Some of whom you can even read their short stories on my website.
Don't delay. Don't wait. Do it for yourself, your family, your friends, your career, your health, relationships.
You are worth it. Prove it.
If you want help, text my office at 941.266.7676 or visit my website and read about the programs we have. Sobriety is a gift that you give yourself. You are worth it.