Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Communication in Relationships

One of my clients Clair sat before me more than frustrated over the seemingly relaxed way her boyfriend was handling his side of the communication responsibilities in their relationship.

"It was so very different in the beginning. Just a year ago I felt we were on the same page, but now it has really changed. Initially, if I sent a text, he would respond right back. Now I might send 5 per day, and never hear from him until that nite when he'll thank me most of the time for sending them.

I have asked him why the change, but his responses are so lame! He swears up and down he loves me, appreciates me, yet I'm losing patience. I wanted someone who would be as excited as I am about communicating. The same with emails. The same with phone calls, it all started out great, but I'm not so sure where this is headed. "

As we talked, I asked her to prioritize the love she desired in a relationship, and where her boyfriend was doing great stuff, and where there had been a shift. During the session, as she continued to answer the questions posed, and go deeper, she was realizing that her boyfriend was not wrong with his lack of interest in communicating at the intensity she was, but that unless she let go of her expectations of him to change, the relationship would end.

You see, most couples start out on fire in love. They communicate at levels they normally don't. They attend football games or craft shows when they have no interest, to show interest in their partners. Unfortunately, unless they are telling their lover that this is not normal for them to do, that texting or calling or sending emails is not their thing, or they'll go to one football game per year but that's it, they are setting themselves up to fail.

Honesty, truth, is the key in the beginning. Following your words with actions that match builds trust in a relationship. If you're in a relationship and are trying to catch up with your partner's pace of communication, or love for football, it's heading for a dead end.

After working with Clair for a while we came to this conclusion. If she wanted to stay, she would have to accept her partner's style of , or lack of communication as she desired it. Without resentment on her part. She could ask him first if he would be willing to go back to their initial form of daily contact, and if he said no, accept that as who he is.

If she concluded that she could not let that go, that she wanted that level of daily intimacy and love that came from regular text, calls, and emails, then she would have to venture out and find it with someone else.

No one is wrong here, it just may take a while when dating someone to see if you are a great match, or just an OK one. Never, ever, settle for OK. Look for a great partner, and you will find one.

Slow down, and find the deep communication style in relationships that you truly desire. Yes, it is possible.

Love, peace, David www.davidessel.com

The Leader's Edge: What Makes Leaders Successful Workshop

September 30, 2009

Join us for this powerful motivational workshop on September 30th, 2009. Master Life Coach and Author, David Essel, is partnering with the Institute of Government at Florida Gulf Coast University to offer businesses and individuals in our community one of the very best professional and personal development programs that David has developed through his Master Life Coach practice over the past 24 years. During that time literally thousands of clients have benefited from David's powerful techniques for self actualization and transformation. Now, we are offering The Leader's Edge: What Makes Leaders Successful to empower you to learn these skills so that you can incorporate them into you own business or practice.

What Makes Leaders Excel?
What truly sets leaders apart from those who simply aspire to be the best in their field? Today's leader requires the ability to establish strong working relationships through vision, communication, diplomacy, creativity, and self- awareness. In this presentation you will learn how to align these leadership skills and practices with your goals for success including:

* How leaders in today's world stay inspired in their passion and purpose.
* What the top people in any field have in common that keeps them going strong regardless of what's going on around them.
* How you, too, can reach the incredible successes that true leaders achieve and maintain in all aspects of their lives.

Fee: $49 (Includes continental breakfast)

Date: September 30, 2009
Presenter: David Essel, M.S.
Location: Atrium Executive Center; Suite 1181
Time: 8:30 am- 9:00 am (meet and greet)
9:00 am- 11:00 am
Registration: 239-425-3271

Men's Success & Faith Group - Every Wednesday

Every Wednesday 6-7pm

Join the Men's Success & Faith Group with David Essel, as we explore how men can be more successful, deepen their faith, relationships, career, family and life!!

You may join at anytime. There is no charge. No need to RSVP.

Location: Lotus Blossom Clinic, 6710 Winkler Road, Suite 2, Fort Myers, FL 33919,
Phone: 941 266 7676

See what men are saying...

"Last nights men's group was very powerful as always. This group, under your leadership, has transformed my life in many positive ways. The two simple rules we follow in the group, 1) do not give advice 2) do not speak unless asked, have taught me a new way of listening and communicating. Not giving advice, not trying to fix everyone, not talking over others. WHAT A NOVEL CONCEPT. What this has done for me is give me a place where I can speak in total honesty and know I will not be judged or fixed, just listened to. It is the most freedom I have ever felt.I now know how others would feel if I used these methods. Trust me, this is a work in progress. Our groups path of total honesty has been the hardest thing I have ever attempted. To "stand in the fire", totally vulnerable, to stand in the anothers pain, to accept responsibility for your actions, is the only way a man should live. Thank you my brothers." - B

Monday, September 28, 2009

Presenting with Passion

3 week course begins on October 15, 22 & 29
Thursdays 2-5pm

Learn the art of presenting and public speaking with Master Life Coach and Motivational Speaker, David Essel.

"Great communicators, as well as great speakers aren't born that way, they all have a system to follow to create their dynamic ability to communicate, at work, in front of groups, and in their personal relationships." - David Essel

David Essel's program can help you to create your own communication system and style that will allow you to become an exceptional communicator. This course not only gives you techniques for sound and stimulating public speaking, but can help you build the confidence to do it with ease. From the elevator speech to the lecture hall, David will guide you through the processes that can help you tap into your innate ability to use your voice, your words and your passion to deliver your message in a way that will engage and enthrall your audiences, both large and small.

You will learn among other things how to:

1) Create a Simple yet Effective Outline for speaking
2) Keep Your Audience's Attention
3) Speak with Brevity and Power

David provides a unique opportunity to not only develop compelling speaking skills, but as a life coach he can help you break through the barriers that hold you back from getting your message out to the world!

Cost: $350 (50% off the normal cost of this course $695). This discount is being given as a courtesy to the Church of Spiritual Light.
Location: Church of Spiritual Light, 1939 Park Meadows Dr. Unit 1, Ft. Myers, FL 33907

For information/registration, call David Essel, 941-266-7676.

"I wanted to let you know how rewarding and relevant your public speaking class was. Regardless of whether I will be presenting a training session, providing information at a sales meeting, speaking one on one with someone or in front of a group, the techniques I learned are invaluable. Speaking in public has always intrigued me but I never thought much about putting my thoughts into action because I didn't feel I "owned" a topic nor had the confidence to make it come to fruition. Today tells a different story and the thoughts of delivering a presentation that excites an audience and/or informs them on the subject matter is something I look forward to. Thank you so much for sharing your ideas, strategies, skills, experience, etc. to allow us to focus on our strengths, gain confidence and have the ability to present to an audience a speech they will never forget! As always, your dedication, caring and knowledge mean so much!" - Joann Marlow, Regional Manager, SellState Premier Realty Network

"David Essel's, Presenting With Passion, will teach you how to get your point across to others in a laser like 60 seconds! You will learn the incredible power of an outline in organizing thought. It can easily be expanded from one minute to one hour, from a short talk to a complete book. David's feedback was encouraging yet he gently provided specific opportunities for improvement and told us exactly how to get there. Whether you plan to speak publicly or just use these new skills in your personal and business life the experience you gain through organization, preparation and actually delivering a short talk will give you newfound confidence and personal power that can't be taken away! "- David Jennings

Oct 15th, 22nd, & 29th 2-5pm

Surprises Along The Spiritual Path: Part 2

Here are just a few comments from my last article regarding the surprises we encounter along our spiritual path.

"David, Thanks for being so open and transparent with your life so we too might understand those universal truths that might otherwise escape us. I have found that only by allowing God to flow through me do "my" gifts come alive. It seems whatever outcome we might believe we want, the most effective path is honoring our connection to our Source."

AMEN! Yes, the path is not about our desires by themselves, but rather a surrendering to the source called God, the Light, The Way, who if we just stop fighting along the way, will open the correct doors for us to powerfully impact others by and with, our unique gifts.

"I would never have thought my life would be filled with the peace and happiness it is today, had I not let go of controlling life, and daily asked my Source for the answers to where I could be of most service. The answers will come for everyone, have patience, and thank you for your constant words of encouragement!"

I love to read about the lives of people like Norman Vincent Peale, Max Lucado, Bruce Wilkinson , Beth Moore, Ghandi, and others who have devoted their lives to love, to God and the way that each of them could serve this world on their spiritual path. All representatives in their own right of the path Christ lived.

Slow down and connect with your path, which may also be filled with spiritual surprises today.

Love, peace, David www.davidessel.com

Surprises Along the Spiritual Path

Several years ago while attending a personal growth weekend intensive, I was confronted with one of my many surprises along my own spiritual path.

One of the quests we were put on that weekend was to try and discover the one area of life that we would like to see a radical shift occur in. After deliberation, I decided to stick with the goal I had selected a few days before and that the financial arena is where my greatest growth could come from in order that I might more powerfully affect this world. I created my intention and shared it with the group.

Almost instantly, a woman who had been on the sideline watching my reading of my goal almost jumped out of her skin and said "David you've got it all wrong, it's your spiritual path that you need to focus on. That's where your greatest gifts are, THAT'S WHERE YOUR ATTENTION SHOULD BE. GETTING CLOSER TO GOD, SPREADING HIS WORD IS THE INTENTION YOU SHOULD FOCUS ON."

As I capitalize these words for effect, you get the picture of the enthusiasm she had in sharing her beliefs with me. I was just stunned, not only by what she said but in the manner she said it. I looked around the room, thinking that maybe someone else might speak up, but it was just her and I.

After talking to her for a few minutes in front of the group, I once again looked for help from someone else who might see things differently, so that I had the support I needed to keep my initial intention intact. None came.

It was evident that I needed to think about her statements, as many times God uses people as messengers, and often these messengers have messages we may not initially agree with. I went home that night and prayed, trying to see if her words would ring true, and when I awoken the next morning I did in fact see how powerful her message was to me.

Yes, she was right. Yes in fact her words made me go directly to God who gave me the same answer. Approximately a year or so later, I was the co-founder of a brand new church in Fort Myers Florida, something that I am so thrilled to be a part of, but definitely a surprise along my own spiritual path. It reminds me of a conversation I had with Deepak Chopra during an interview several years ago regarding the topic "How to know God." The way to know God is to talk with him, to daily create the space and time to be in communion.

I had gone into a workshop to learn how to manifest money, and had come out with the drive to become closer to God.

Slow down and be open today to the surprises in store for you, if you are open, along your own spiritual path.

Love, peace, David www.davidessel.com

Friday, September 25, 2009

The Real Estate Professionals Quandary

The past few months has brought up an interesting quandary to many of my real estate agent clients: "Is it time yet to go full blast back into the marketing and branding of my business?"

When they pose this question to me, the obvious response would be "when did you pull back your efforts to be successful?" To just a few , the answer would be several years ago when the markets in many states began to die. To most, the answer may be somewhere between denial that they have slacked off to absolute obstinacy that they have ever minimized their efforts.

Yet the truth is for many, our effort is not the same as it was 2-3 years ago. And that has to change starting today. The most successful agents that I'm working with are still in the office 5 days per week, and no later than a 9am start time. They see that even though their income has dropped, that their effort cannot. A few are getting back to a fantastic income, but that has only been evident in their bank accounts the last few months. What has led to this turn around has been an unfailing effort over the past few years.

After talking with numerous professionals as well as investors in this field just last week, the feeling is that 2010 will be a fantastic year in comparison to the past two. Especially for the states of Florida, California, and New York. Texas also seems to be on the rebound as well, and many other states should be following in this trend in the very near future.

Now is the time to rock and roll. Now is the time for all real estate agents to kick into high gear for the coming year. Get your discipline back, your work efforts in gear, your branding and advertising, blogging and email marketing systems in action.

Slow down, get the help you need from brokers, trainers and business coaches now, not tomorrow, so that you're fully ready to create the life you so desire and deserve.

Love, peace David www.davidessel.com

PS...Don't forget to sign up for our free bi-monthly free real estate educational audio program sent directly to your inbox! Go to our site, the link is at the bottom of our page....

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Emotional Foreplay: A Powerful Sexual Lubricant

If there ever was a powerful sexual lubricant, it has to be emotional foreplay. If done correctly, and consistently, it will get both partners into that amazing intimate zone where the world of passion ignites the flow of sexual and emotional fluids. Put quite simply, emotional foreplay rocks.

So what exactly is emotional foreplay? It's the myriad of actions that helps you connect and get excited about being with your partner. From text messages that say "I love you", to emails, phone calls and yes even a card dropped in the mail for no apparent reason.

Emotional foreplay is to sex what pre- season training is to the athlete. Without it, your season is going nowhere. If we want a relationship to not just last, but to prosper beyond belief, we must put the daily effort into keeping our love alive.

I remember a time when I had left my partner a very loving and explicit voicemail , about how I wanted to hold her, kiss her and yes more that very evening. I went into great detail about how slowly I would kiss her and what would happen the minute I saw her. When I called a few hours later just to say hi, she was totally in that zone of love, of desire, and said how she could not wait to kiss me as well. Hearing her response sent me into the most amazing tailspin, which then increased our desire to be with each other.

Without that initial call, while we would have still had an amazing connection, it could never have gone as deep as it did. To me, this is what intimacy is all about. She told me repeatedly how much she appreciated not just the message, but the very fact that I continued to stay connected even if we were not together.

If a man makes his partner dinner, and surprises her with even the simplest of meals, that's emotional foreplay. If a woman goes out of her way to pick her partner up his favorite coffee without being asked, and swings by his office unannounced with this small gift, that's the glue called emotional foreplay.

It gets our minds, hearts, thoughts and bodies flowing. It's the simple acts that helps to deepen your emotional connection to your partner.

Slow down, and make emotional foreplay, a powerful sexual lubricant, a part of your daily life.

Love, peace, David www.davidessel.com

You are so much more than you may know...

As I sat listening to a third client in a row lament the fact that their life had not turned out the way that they had hoped, that they weren't as wonderful as they thought because of what was going on in their world, a constant thought was racing through my head, "You are so much more than you may know."

Isn't it true? We rarely see the full beauty that we are. We rarely hold on to that truth for very long if we ever do see it. If we could see that absolute divinity that we are, the magnificent human that we each are, and hold onto that truth when things are great, or when they seemingly slip, the world would be the most majestic place we could ever imagine.

For it takes that kind of individual self love to transform the world. Yes, YOU are the center of your Universe. YOU are that important, that beautiful, that immense, that unique, that awe inspiring! How do I know this to be true? God told me so. In my daily communion, I continue to receive His message of the uniqueness, the full out love that each of us are. That every one of us carry. That we have the hardest time seeing for ourselves.

The mystics have told us this for thousands of years. Jesus told us, as did Buddha. The Gnostic bible is filled with this information too. So, when will we see this beautiful fact? When we make up our minds to and not a moment sooner.

A client lost his life savings recently, and was afraid to date as he had equated his self esteem with how much money he had. When he realized that his true value always resided in his heart, he headed out to meet the woman of his dreams, and will not stop until love becomes his new life focus. He is seeing the absolute beauty that he is, and for the first time in 15 years, is exuding a confidence, a sincerity, that even his co workers are commenting on.

Another client who in the past 6 months gained 30 pounds, had become emotionally housebound, as her friends had always commented on how she was always the one in such fantastic physical shape. Recently, after spending 30 days examining her true self worth, which again resided in her heart, not her body, she adopted a fully exuberant attitude about life and is back in the world spreading her love and faith.

Most of us by pass who we truly are, the gifts we have been given that are unique to us. Until we look into the mirror and see that divine self, we will always sell ourselves short, just wishing we had the body, money, luck, job, partner or whatever of someone else.

Today is the day to awaken to your own individual beauty. Are you ready for the task? A simple yes, will open up a whole new world to you and everyone around you.

Slow down to see, that you are so much more than you may ever know.

Love, peace, David www.davidessel.com

Monday, September 21, 2009

Who are you really?...

If I could ask one question of the world, of all 7 billion people, it would be "Who are you really?"

Not what your current title is, or what schools you've attended. I'd rather know what moves you, who are you really.

If you had one day, to spend with anyone, who would it be?

If you had one meal to eat, what would it be?

If you had one prayer to say, what would it be?

If you had one place to visit, where would it be?

If you had one person to leap into love with, who would it be?

If you had one regret to let go of, what would it be?

If you had one place to make love in, that you never have, where would it be?

If you had one choice to live anywhere you could, where would it be?

If you could choose any pet in the world to have, what would it be?

If you could just choose one person to turn to when you are in despair, who would it be?

When life seems filled with challenge, where do you go to find solace, love?

Who is your higher power, God, or Savior?

What are the two most important gifts that you have, coming from the inside , that you have in your life, that makes you absolutely unique in this world?

What secret do you hold, about yourself, that you'd rather not share? What is it?

I would love to know these things, for if you were able to tell me, that would show me that you are indeed quite rare. You're the type of person I want on my team, in my life, right now.

For if you can answer each of these questions, you truly know who you are.

And that makes you someone that everyone needs in their life as well.

You see, there is not one trick question here at all.

There is not one question that you do not have an answer for.

You are the gold you seek, and once this is revealed to you, by you, your life will never be the same.

You'll see, that you are a magnificent child of God, of Universal light, who deserves all that this world can offer.

Most importantly one who deserves to love, and be loved, at the most magical level ever known to man.

Slow down, and discover the beauty of who you really are.

Love, peace, David www.davidessel.com

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Blogging: A Success Secret for Real Estate Agents

Real estate agents from around the world are missing a great opportunity to secure more clients, more closings and more referrals if they are currently not blogging on a weekly basis. At the past two conferences that I have spoken at, less than 10% of the agents are blogging at all. One of the hidden success secrets that all of my real estate clients are taking advantage of, is weekly blogs to educate and stay in front of all of their clients.

As an example, blogs can be used to inform your clients about upcoming deadlines regarding the government tax incentives for first time home buyers. Since you can't possible call everyone you know, all past and current clients in your data base , to let them know that they have until November 30, 2009 to take advantage of this, you could surely write a short blog and get the information out there asap!

There are literally thousands of topics that any agent can blog about that could be of great benefit to both buyers and sellers. You could even do blogs that offer interviews with mortgage brokers, short sales experts and more to spice up your own knowledge on these topics.

At the very least, begin blogging today and offer a minimum of one blog per week for your data base. Go to www.blogger.com and in about 5 minutes you can have your own blog set up and running. If you want help to customize your blogs with pictures etc. as we have done with mine, any webmaster could easily and inexpensively assist you in doing this. My webmaster Renee Bledsoe is an expert at this, and you could even ask her to assist you by contacting her at renee@weavestheweb.com .

Please do not wait another day, as blogging is a great way to separate yourself from the competition, and offer a great service to your clients at the same time.

Slow down, and use the power of blogging to increase your business and potential as a real estate professional.

Love, peace David www.davidessel.com

"To receive our free Real Estate Audio Educational Tips, simply sign up on our homepage at www.davidessel.com , and we'll email them to you twice per month absolutely free!"

The Path to Love through Devotion: Part 2

The response to this first blog on love and devotion was so fantastic, that I wanted to expound upon it just a little more. It is by far one of the most overlooked topics when it comes to creating the deepest of love relationships.

"By far, this article on Devotional Love was the catalyst to get me thinking in a whole new way. My boyfriend and I read it together, and afterward, as I had tears, he moved closer and just held me, saying nothing. He doesn't share his emotions often, which has had me on the verge of leaving him several times. Later that evening, he looks directly at me and tells me he has decided to devote his life to me! I was in shock! When i asked him to explain what he means, he just held me close and told me that he has just gone beyond love.....he now is in a state of total devotion to me, us, and our love. I am in awe, and want to thank you for being some sort of catalyst in our lives. " Danille

"I've never thought of devoting myself to anyone but God...but you made me think...since God is love, it makes perfect sense that I can devote my life to my husband, to love him with absolute devotion....as the love I'm recommitting to him is the God's grace in my heart...thank you, as I write this he's reading my words, and is moved beyond belief...." Joey

"OK, I thought you went a little overboard here with this devotion/love stuff...seemed a little too intense for me...and a little scary...what if I devote my love at the deepest level to my partner, and she doesn't do the same? Then it hit me ...you had written before that if we are open, devoted, and real ...our partner has the best chance to be the same..and if we are both there, look out right? real love can exist..Cathy and I talked last nite about this, and we even wrote it down, that from this moment forward, we are in total devotion to each other..

when we finished, i said that this seems even more serious, deeper than a marriage license...she responded, it is...devotion, when spoken between 2 people, raises the bar..you did this for us..and we are ready..thank you so very much for going deeper in your work. " Patrick

I sat in amazement as I read the various responses to the article. Yes, when I devote myself everyday to my partner, it does go deep, it does act as a reminder that there are no other options if I want the chance for the most amazing Divine Union that this planet can offer. Devotion, real devotion demands of us to create a daily ritual to remind us of what we are desiring to create!

It does not come at first without a conscious, concentrated effort. If you want something magical, amazing in your life, you must put that same effort out there. It's a simple law, a universal law, and it works.

You have to be fully ready to devote your life to someone, to state it, yes write it, then practice it daily. If this is the type of love you want, talk to your partner about that. If you're single and desire this, see it as already done in your mind, then it will have the chance to manifest.

Slow down, create the love you want through conscious, daily devotion to your partner.

Love, peace, David http://www.davidessel.com

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Vulnerability in Love: Are you ready?

One of my best friends and a former client, who I love dearly, sat before me pouring his heart out as he discussed his love relationship. "I have never been so vulnerable, and I have never received such an amazing response from anyone I've ever been with. I feel open, ready, desiring the deepest of love. "

At first glance, his statement could seem so frivolous, so cute, or so powerful. Which is it to you?

If you know anything about the Law of Attraction, as is written in many books including those by Jerry and Esther Hicks, my friend was smack dab in the middle of it. He had attracted, created, manifested the deepest connection in love, because he was willing to "go there" first. Because he was willing to be so vulnerable, which is what love truly is all about, in return he was experiencing all that he desired. It's not magic, but it works. Every time.

So many people say that they want the deepest love connection, then sit back and play it safe. At the first sign of trouble or their own insecurity, they shut down, or worst, run. He had stepped into the fire of love, exposed his own insecurities with his lover from the very beginning, and as he would share later, his partner had matched him step by step.

There were no games, no cat and mouse, no keeping the other off balance, wondering where they stood in love. From the beginning, they had voiced, and then followed through with their actions, that they were both ready to move to deep intimacy, deep trust, and put their love for each other at the forefront of everything else.

And what they both received in return was stunning. In a very short period of time, they were at the place of love that normally took some couples years to reach. But it was not without effort, and as he mentioned 50 times in 50 minutes, being vulnerable was the key.

"Our issues in the beginning were dealt with immediately. That was different, because in the beginning of love many times we don't speak honestly, as we do not want to rock any boats. We just bypassed that stage, and were very real. It seemed that for the first time in each of our lives, that we left the infatuation stage of love quite early. Not that we aren't deeply attracted to each other still, because we truly are, but that being intimate, real, open took precedent over all else. Holding each other for hours seemed like the natural thing to do. Speaking of our fears as we held each other, seemed natural, although I will admit scary. Both of us shedding tears as we spoke about what frightened us in love, opened these huge doors that we basically ran through together. That's the type of thing couples usually wait too long to do. "

I just sat there smiling, as I had no need to give advice, other that to say "rock on".

Vulnerability in love is the only path that will lead to the real thing. Are you ready?

Slow down to create the love, or to prepare yourself for the love, you've always wanted.

Love, peace, David http://www.davidessel.com

Media distractions to avoid as a Real Estate Professional

If you truly want to get ahead as a real estate professional, or anyone in commission sales for that matter, you'll have to be aware of the media distractions that can pull you off course in your quest for success.

Now, what I'm about to share will seem outrageous to some, and make complete common sense to others. If it bothers you, do it anyway, and watch your focus and productivity increase dramatically.

For the most part, TV, newspapers and radio news clips are created to sensationalize the negativity in our world. If you're an avid viewer, reader or listener of the news, I can almost guarantee that you are far from reaching your potential in business, and further away from making the money you want to make.

Pretty bold statement to some, common knowledge to others.

If you really want to maximize your potential in this field, I'm going to ask you to take a 14 day hiatus from ALL media. Yes, ALL media.

No news of any type, no garbage into your brain that saps you of energy and creativity. Instead, fill this time with motivational Cd's, DVDs, and books.

Do you think you can do it?

I will guarantee that if you follow this simple plan, you'll find a major shift in your attitude over this very short period of time. Now, you may get anxious, even irritable, as you miss your daily dose of negativity, as it truly can become an addiction. But I know from working with hundreds of agents over the past many years, that every single one of them were shocked at how their productivity increased so dramatically when they removed the negative media from their lives.

Do you really need another mention of the state of our economy? Or how the real estate market is still so slow? Don't you realize that if something truly remarkable occurs, you'll find out about it from someone else?

Slow down, remove the media distractions starting today to maximize your potential in the world of real estate.

Love, peace, David http://www.davidessel.com

Visit the link above to get your free audio educational segments on real estate sent directly to your inbox!

The Path to Love Through Devotion

If we ever want to reach the highest level of our existence on earth, we will at some point have to realize the reason for our existence: to create the deepest of love through daily devotion.

Now admittedly, this is a huge undertaking, but the end result will surely be more than worth our effort. As I write this, I can reflect on the relationships that did not work, partially due to the fact that I never consciously, verbally, and in writing, offered this type of unending devotion to my partner. Why? Because then we are held accountable. Then we will be asked daily to prove our words to be true. And quite frankly, that can scare the hell out of us.

But oh my Lord...just think of the most amazing end result if we now choose to walk this path! To devote our self to our partner, our lover, offers the deepest ,most intimate of all relations. To consciously, together, repeat that we are devoted to one another for life........to rise above the small ego's pettiness, to let go of resentments AS THEY OCCUR, and yes, to not hold them a second longer than necessary. To awaken each morning with the mantra, "God, direct me to do more for my partner today in all ways, show me the path to serve them with devoted love. "

Now that, is devotion. Are you ready to walk this path with me? Are you ready to open your heart to the most vulnerable of all places to flow in the love of the divine with your partner? To be free of past conditioning of what love means, and to jump off the cliff of true love, with your mind simply wrapped around the concept of serving your lover?

In Hinduism, one of the paths to God is called bhakti yoga. Simply put, it is a path of love, where everything you do all day long is devoted to God. As you work, walk, eat, you chant God's name. As you read scripture, you devote yourself to God. The emotion of love for God is the driving force behind this path. It is the driving force of life.

We can use this metaphor and take it another step forward by deciding to love God with all of our heart, and then put this same energy into loving with deep devotion, our partner as well. I have heard of so many "arranged marriages", where the partners fall into this type of devoted love. Even in the beginning, if they were not overly attracted to their arranged partner, over a short period of time they fell madly in love due to their devotional mindset!!

Think about this!!! Can you imagine what you and I can do, if we devote ourselves to loving a partner who we are attracted to??? If they can accomplish this after being "set up" in a marriage, can you imagine what we can do as well, when we enter our marriage/relationship by choice?

When I think about devoting my life, my love, to my partner, it brings about a feeling of surrender. A feeling so deep, that it can barely even be described. When we choose to do this together, a whole new world, a whole new definition of love becomes a part of our beings. Divine union has just occurred, and yes, we can then experience Shambala, or Heaven on Earth.

Decide today to walk this path with me, to create the most sacred of relationships.

Slow down to create a path of love through devotion to your partner.

Love, peace, David http://www.davidessel.com

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Maximizing Your Business Potential in Real Estate

When I began my work as a business coach in the world of real estate, the very first question from a broker that hired me had to do with the challenge of getting his agents to maximize their own potential. "I can offer them the education they need, but I want to learn from you how to get them to not only see their potential in this field, but then to go after it without fear!"

I so loved his attitude, his openness, that before I knew it I had created a whole new line of work for myself that I had never intended on doing. And the most fascinating fact about all of this was that I had no professional training in this field, which meant that I had no blind spots. Business coaching is business coaching, it all revolves around attitudes and plans. Where others would rely on the "that concept would never work here, not in this industry, not at this time, not in this economy"...I had none of that baggage. All I knew was, where there was a system to follow, there could be success.

Today is no different than my very first experience years ago. As I continue to work with brokers and agents from across the USA, my intense desire to see these individuals reach their highest level of success, to exceed their own potential, is at the top of my list during each session or at every convention that I speak at.

Here are some tips that I'd love every professional in this field, (or any other commission based sales professionals) to ask themselves as they move forward in life:

1) What does my 30 day sales/prospecting system consist of...and is it in writing?

2) When was the last time I recorded myself doing a buyer/seller sales presentation?

3) What are my current beliefs about the economy , my industry, and my current income level?

4) Why am I in this industry?

5) What would it take for me to double or triple my income in the next 12 months? (If you think you can answer this question on your own...most of us will never achieve the success we desire. Why? Because whatever it is that you are creating right now regarding income, is from your best thinking and motivation. We need outside input to excel in life.Ask someone else to answer this question for you. )

All motivated professionals will take this mini survey and write out the answers to each question within the next 24 hours. Are you ready to create the business you really want? If so, start working on this assignment right now.

One of my clients joined the real estate industry 2 years ago, just as it was beginning to dramatically drop. As a new agent, he decided to hire me to assist him in his quest. With a new family, he needed to create success, and quickly. I told him that the first place to begin was with a daily system of action steps that must be followed religiously, and if he were to do this, his success would shortly follow.

For 6 months we worked together weekly, with little sign of success. But his attitude was impeccable. His work ethic, no more, no less than 40 hours per week, was amazingly consistent. At the 7 month mark, things started to happen even though by then the market was crashing. Today, he is a brilliant success story, and I give him all the credit.

His desire, diligence, and effort have paid off with a salary he only dreamed about before. Our current market has not stifled his enthusiasm, and the same opportunity is waiting for you as well. If you want it, you can create a system for success and finally allow yourself the chance to maximize your potential in this field.

Slow down, and start your new path today.

Love, peace David http://www.davidessel.com/

ps...we are now offering free educational/ motivational audio segments for brokers and agents to use to enhance their success in business. Simply go to our site, and you can listen , or download, and if you'd like, sign up for our e-newsletter and have these audio clips sent your your inbox twice every month for free!

I look forward to meeting everyone this Friday in New York at the annual Greater Capitol Association of Realtors Conference , as I offer the Keynote on this very topic! We will have an amazing time......

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Dealing with sensitive , sexual challenges

In all partnerships, if you are living on the edge of love, sexuality, eroticism and sensuality, you will have to learn how to deal with times that offer sensitive, sexual challenges. How a couple faces and walks through these fires is exactly in equivalence to how deep they can go in love, and how far reaching their own love can blossom.

I'd love to share a personal experience, to prove just how crucial communication is in love.

My partner and I had just fallen into each others arms, and our passion ignited in an instant. While at other times we had let this passion build slowly, this would be far from that. We were purely primal in this instant, with kisses that were very assertive, hands that groped for ecstasy, and bodies writhing in the pleasure of physical union.

As our fire built, I followed my natural instinct and began verbalizing certain phrases, that were igniting passion between us at an even deeper level. At one point, I passed an "unknown, unspoken line", and said something that stopped my partner in her tracks. She looked down at me and said, "David, I didn't like that "......Unsure of what she meant , I asked for clarification.

She repeated several times the phrase, and how it made her feel. I reached up held her in my arms and drew her close. At that moment, her tears started flowing. I started to talk.

"I'm so sorry for hurting you with words, that I had no idea would take you to this level. I am so sorry that you are feeling this pain. Let me hold you, let me share my safety with you again. "

As her tears continued to flow, I held her closer, closer and closer again. Within a short time, we had raised our level of love, of trust to a completely new dimension. As we slowed down, we began touching, kissing again with an amazingly soft and sensual intention. We rebuilt the trust, we spoke from the heart, and she knew she was safe once again. The trigger was gone, and we had grown to know each other at a whole new level.

In the past , each of us may have reacted in a totally different way. I may have become defensive, she may have shut down. But because we had decided to speak daily to each other about our desire to lift each other to higher levels of love, we know that the other person would never hurt us with intention. We stood in the fire of love that afternoon in bed, and reaped the amazing rewards that true, deep intimacy offers.

Slow down, speak with love as you hit sensitive, sexual challenges, and watch love bloom.

Love, peace David http://www.davidessel.com/

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Surrendering to Grace, with Father Ron

Several years ago I found out the true meaning of surrender, and how that act could bring about an experience of grace. And it all had to do with father Ron.

After avoiding the issue for years, I finally admitted I had a problem with alcohol. Denial and rationalization had worked wonders in helping me to avoid dealing with the one area of life that was holding me back. For many people, alcohol is a best friend, a definite escape tool that allows us to duck from dealing with reality, our own and that of the world.

I decided to check into a 30 day treatment center, The Hanley Center in West Palm Beach Florida. But don't let the location name fool you, as the center was located in the middle of "crack city". I was not going to a posh beach side resort to get clean, but rather an amazing powerful center in one of the worst areas of town.

After spending a few days in the detox wing, to prevent any chance of convulsions due to the removal of my daily alcohol fix, I was asked to briefly stop by the Spiritual Director's office where I met Father Ron. A Monsignor in the Catholic Church, Fr. Ron asked me to enter , but not to sit down as this would be short.

"Why do you think you're here?" he asked.

"Well, to get sober I guess, or to learn to drink moderately, or maybe to get on a medication to stop my desire for alcohol", I answered, still in somewhat of a denial of this disease.

"What if I were to tell you you are here for none of those answers?", he asked.

I stood there dumbfounded, not having any idea of what to say.

"Listen, I know about your work, your books, and feel I have an idea about your path in life. I want you to meditate on what I'm about to share with you tonite, and tomorrow. Then we'll meet at 2pm, and talk about this concept.

The only reason you are here is to get closer with God. To become one with God. If you take the next 30 days in this center, and devote yourself to this purpose, you will never desire alcohol or drugs again for the rest of your life. Think about this, I'll see you tomorrow. "

With that, I was gone. As I walked away, I could feel my head spinning. What was he talking about? I had been meditating for 20 years, praying daily for many more, and felt an already deep connection with God. How could deepening my relationship with God, cure addiction?

I thought about his statement all nite, and at 5am the next morning went to walk the track and meditate on his words. Within 15 minutes, a whole new world, a whole new understanding of life had opened before me! Yes, I had felt the Grace of God, right on the track! Yes I now knew what Fr. Ron had said was true! A lightness filled my being, Grace had been administered, and the opening had come through the words he shared.

For the next 30 days, I immersed myself into the work of God, through prayer circles, meditation, group therapy, one on one spiritual counseling and more. I surrendered my knowledge of addiction, and became a sponge to everything the counselors would share with me.

At the end of the 30 day stay, I had been reborn, healed at the deepest of levels, and that healing still continues to this day through my own daily rituals and the mission of my life.

Slow down, surrender , accept the Grace of the Divine, and watch your life change as well.

Love, peace, David http://www.davidessel.com

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Unusual Stages of Enlightenment, Awakening

After receiving so many comments regarding our first article on awakening, or the steps of enlightenment, I wanted to share some very important information that should help many of us in our quest for higher levels of functioning.

As I briefly alluded to before, the path to enlightenment is not all bliss and fun as many people believe it to be.

Let's look at a variety of circumstances that could be the lamp posts you are looking for, to know you are directly on path. These are what some may say, are the unusual steps to this beautiful state:

..if you see you are in constant doubt..about yourself, life...

..realize that you are very unhappy in your job or relationship...

..come to acknowledge an addiction in your life...

...realize that yes, you gossip often..

...become aware that you talk about and lean on one of your many "stories in life.."IE, money is always a struggle...men are all dogs...because of your childhood, you ...fill in the blank....

..you understand that you "live on the fence a lot in life"...you're afraid to take chances...

If you come to any of these realizations, Congratulations! You've just moved up your own personal ladder towards enlightenment, for it is only when you acknowledge the truth, about you, that you can really start to change.

Stepping into the unknown, letting go of the past, or thoughts that do not make you feel strong, centered, is a key to personal growth.

Awakening to your next level can be as simple as seeing the truth here, for your own life, and then surrounding yourself daily with what you are thankful for, vs what is not/has not worked in your life.

Slow down, see the power of who you are, not what you've been. Watch for the unusual stages of enlightenment in your life.

Love, peace, David http://www.davidessel.com/

Friday, September 4, 2009

Do You Really Love Yourself?

.....A client recently sat before me pleading for the path to inner peace. Instead of answering, I asked her if she loved herself, I mean really loved herself.

Her answer of course was the same that you or I might say if we want to escape the truth. Of course, we'd all say yes.

But do we really? And how would we know if we did, or did not?

For years I truly believed that I loved myself, and yet I chose to abuse alcohol and stay in unhealthy love relationships . So, how could I truly love myself and carry on those behaviors? The answer is simple, I couldn't. Something had to radically change if I wanted to truly prove to the world, myself, and my higher power that I did in fact love who I was.

And how about you? What are your actions saying, not your pretty thoughts, about the depth that you do really love yourself?

Do you overeat? Or involve yourself in any addictive behavoirs?

Are you looking for opportunities to gossip?

Do you hate, or dislike your current body?

Do you spend money on items you really don't need?

The list could go on and on.......but instead of that, simply look inside and do an honest evaluation of who you are, then decide today to stop the actions that prove a lack of self love, and get the help you need to love yourself again.

At the end of our session, my client looked at me and said "I really hate my body. I refuse to ever be naked around my boyfriend, and get angry if he walks in on me when I'm undressed. I guess I'm a ways from self love, and the inner peace I want."

For her, enlightenment had just occurred, as through admitting the truth, she now has the opportunity to change.

Slow down, learn how to love yourself more deeply today.

Love, peace, David http://www.davidessel.com

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Sensual Touch: The Key to Intimate Connection

Without a doubt, one of the keys to deepening our intimate connection with our partner is through the art of sensual touch. And it all begins with consciousness.

Science has shown us that people actually "starve to death", when they are void of human touch for long periods of time. During an interview with author Barbara Keesling, she explained that millions of hormones are released throughout the body just through the simple act of a touch, stroke, or hug. This sensual nourishment is important for our physical, emotional and psychological well being.

In relationship coaching, I have seen couples separate emotionally from each other when the relationship has just a minimal amount of sensual touch. And the converse is true as well. Healthy couples all have one thing in common, the conscious desire and daily follow through of the art of sensual touch.

Look at these simple yet effective examples:

...holding hands everywhere possible...

....stroking your lovers hair before bed...

...kissing, touching, and yes sucking on their toes...

Here's an exercise for you:

Lay naked next to your lover facing them, and run your fingers down the middle of their back. Go to the buttocks area, and allow your finger to run softly down the middle, underneath, and barely touch their genital area.

Continue up the front of their body, stomach, chest, to their lips, where you circle their lips with your finger. Repeat, and flow in the art of sensual touch.

Slow down. Deepen your intimate connection with your partner through the act of sensual touch.

Love, peace, David http://www.davidessel.com