"As a psychotherapist with , like you David many years of experience, I must say that the woman who texted during sex either is coming from a sense of entitlement, where her needs in that moment were much more important than his or theirs, or she may have an emotional blockage. You described it as "dissociation", a powerful mechanism designed to keep us from full emotional vulnerability and attachment in love. I hope either way she finds herself with a great therapist or coach, and honestly describes what she was doing during intimacy with this man. and I hope he heals well, that is hell to put someone through. It's looked at as a form of betrayal, which shatters trust in love. "
"ok, no one reading this will be a fan of mine. Honestly, I used to do that kind of crap regularly to a former boyfreind, and I'm not proud of it now. My therapist told me it was because I was afraid of depth, I was self centered, so I would do whatever was of most interest to me, whatever made me comfortable. I would slide away from being in good contact with him during the day, occaisionally grab the cell during sex. I usually got my way in relationships...a pretty lame way to live. I've left guys hanging during events that they really wanted me at.
That was a few years ago, and when one guy finally put me in my place, I went and got help. this is not the first time I bet this chick treated this guy poorly, either. I know that for sure. "
"I swear it is getting worse and worse. Total lack of regard. What's worse is, she probably has him totally controlled by random acts of hurt and manipulation such as this."
"This is funny and sad. Nobody is aware of the ppl around them anymore. Just go out to dinner or coffee, every one is texting wile they are with there loved ones or friends. We are so disconnected from each-other. "
"Hi David. Very interesting posting. It's sad that we are living in a society that it has resulted in to text messaging during something as wonderful as sex. I am glad your client has been able to move on from this experience. I agree with Doris' posting. "
If you see yourself in this situation, where you are not respecting the person you are with, get help. To actually think that someone could be texting while their lover is performing oral sex on them, just get the picture in your mind right now, is so very sad.
Love, peace, Rev. David www.davidessel.com